Early in your experience as a pawn, you will likely be assigned a ‘pawn job’. Some of these jobs are given simply for comedic but demeaning purposes, but other jobs are simply flat out suck. You usually don’t have a say in assuring which job you get, but on the off chance that you do, I figured a job ranking might help. So, without further ado, here are the top three and bottom three promise jobs (choose wisely):

The best of the best

Minecraft promise

If you didn’t have a Minecraft phase, did you really have a childhood at all? Regardless of your hobbies, passions, or sexual orientation, Minecraft is an incredibly lovable and peaceful game that will bring you happiness that your current life may be lacking. The Minecraft deposit order is simple; Complete the game on hard mode before the promise ends. This job is definitely not as easy as it sounds – and might even involve a sleepless night or two – but how awful can it really be sitting on a couch editing Minecraft? Throw on some classic PewDiePie Minecraft videos and you’ve got all the tools needed to slay the ender dragon. If you have a choice, the Minecraft Pledge job is a lock.

poop promise

Everyone poops – except girls – so the Poop Pledge isn’t going to change your everyday life much. You may be wondering, “What is the Poop Pledge?”. Well, in order to fulfill your duties as the “poop pledge,” one must document blowing mud in every building on campus until the pledge is over. If you attend a small college, this job should be a walk in the park, but an SEC or Big Ten school is a different story. Sure, the 87 buildings you’ll have to poop in in a few months might be intimidating, but just consider it a grand adventure. Not to mention you’ll be incredibly regular And know your campus like the back of your hand. Sounds like a win to me!

Porn Promise

It takes a special Kind of person to take the Porn Pledge job, but it really isn’t that bad. All you have to do is post a daily Dave Portnoy-style review of a video of your choice. Although brothers’ “proposals” will have you witnessing some of the most unholy and grotesque acts of intimacy ever caught on camera, this job is probably one of the least labor intensive out there. Just stay away from the weird shit for as long as possible.

The worst of the worst

Deposit for laundry

If you are elected to the “Laundry Pledge,” bless your soul. do yours own College lingerie blows, not to mention the Frat Star’s fifth-year clothes, with a hearty musk of warm natural light, ax body spray and puke. Regardless of how long your vow lasts, you’ll likely spend more time doing laundry than doing schoolwork. It’s best to be careful not to lose or damage any clothing either, or a tasty red Solo Cup brew will be coming your way soon after.

DoorDash Promise

Any pledge with a car automatically qualifies for the DoorDash Pledge job. As you can probably guess from the name, your job as the “DoorDash Pledge” is to drive all over campus at any time of the day to pick up food for brothers. But picking up the food isn’t even the worst part about this job; It’s the money. There’s no stingier person in the world than a broccoli brother Really needed McDonald’s at 3:00am. With the amount you end up losing in cash spending on groceries and gas, you may need to take out a loan.

weather promise

When you first hear “Weather Pledge” it’s easy to assume that the job wouldn’t be all that challenging, but it’s undoubtedly one of the most excruciating Pledge jobs ever created. During the commitment, you’re lucky enough to sleep before 2:00 am every night, which really sucks when you have to submit a weather report video before 8:00 am every day. There’s really nothing to gain in this job either. If you don’t report the weather accurately, you’re screwed. If you Do If you report the weather accurately, the brothers will blame you for not being eighty degrees and sunny. While it’s probably still preferable to the “DoorDash” or “Laundry” promise, the “Weather Pledge” is still one to avoid at all costs.


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